Doctor: "Miracles do Happen"
Arletty: "Not in this Neighborhood"~La Havre
"Because you are. The universe is big. It's vast, and complicated, and...ridiculous. And--very rarely--impossible things just happen, and we call them miracles. And, that's the theory; nine hundred years, never seen one yet. But this would do me."~Doctor Who
Back in January, I reviewed a Finnish film, Le Havre, directed by Aki Kaurisamaki that ties together the themes of Care-Giving/Love, Risks, and Miracles. That particular film holds a special place in my heart because I saw it last December on my birthday. Having spent most of that morning choking back tears and struggling to deal with heartbreak, I found that discovering an unexpected miracle in Le Havre's plot provided me a measure of hope and peace. I clung to that hope with both hands. Maybe, just maybe, I thought: "Miracles do happen." Of course, my difficult Birthday would be followed by an even more painful month. Then, quite unexpectedly, Something Amazing finally happened. I found the person I lost. Like any real miracle, the Sun Shined through the Dark Clouds and I rejoiced. Yet, somehow I forgot something important during that period: Relationships are less like a Game of Lost and Found (or Hide and Seek whatever you prefer), and more of the Deck Building Persuasion.Sounds strange, I know, but allow me to explain. Even at my best (and right now, I'm at my worst), this Weblogger is a bit scattered. Most days before leaving the house, I set out on a little scavenger hunt to find my purse, keys, and shoes. Once I locate those important items, I'm off. No problem. But People, my Friends, are not Shoes which either fit one's feet or don't. No, individuals are more complex. Despite, compatibilty, we have personal histories, dreams, scars, and nightmares. We change day by day, moment by moment, based upon our own perceptions of the situation. Misunderstandings and hurt feelings happen due to those differences. So where does Deck Building come in? Well, in my opinion, we each choose which cards to hold in our hands and which ones we will play when Fear, Misunderstanding, and Hurts Happen: Anger or Forgiveness; Abandonment or Understanding; Love or Fear. We employ either a Burn Deck only capable of causing Destruction OR a Control Deck capable of slowing the pace of an explosion. Confession: I was raised to play a Burn Deck, preferring a Scorched Earth Strategy in the Wake of a Fallout. However, with Age, Experience, and Someone I consider Quite Special, this Historian has changed her ways. Time to slow down, remember mine is not the only heart at risk, keep calm, and carry on. Today, is Easter Sunday, and I am praying for another miracle. More than anything I want to talk to the person I'm missing. Yet, the Anxiety, at the moment, is overwhelming. Like Arletty, I know "Miracles don't happen" in my neighborhood. Of course, that fact doesn't stop me from hoping. Perhaps my new outlook will help the situation a little: I've set aside my Heavy Infantry and decided to go with a Lifebound Hero. Hearts, I think, ought to be like Dandelions: a Hardy Little Weed which Refuses to Die...even if they get stomped now again.