Friday, November 9, 2012

Citizens of Wonderland

"But I don't want to go among made people," Alice remarked.

"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat: "we're all made here.  I'm mad.  You're mad."

"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice

"You must be," sad the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."
Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass

Now compare:

Counselor: Why do you second guess yourself?

Me: I just don't trust my judgement.  If I come to a conclusion and it makes me happy than it must be wrong.  I must be drawing that conclusion because I WANT that outcome.  Not because its the truth.

Counselor: Can you give me an example.

Me: Well, lets say the blueness of the sky directly impacted the outcome of my desires.  No matter how blue the sky is deep down I would assume that it wasn't really or not the right sort of blue because I want it to be that perfect type of blueness so I'm just fooling myself.  The sky is probably more of a green or purple color in all reality.

Now, I'm gonna be honest, Kiddies, if you can follow my warped line of logic than you're crazy, too.  Stop trying to argue with me.  Its no use.  You can't help it.  I'm mad.  You're mad.  We're all mad here.  In fact, reading this blog is just further evidence you've drifted off the straight and narrow, and have fallen down the Rabbit Hole.  Welcome Wonderland.  Now here's the question:  How are you going to survive? Well, as a long time inhabitant allow me to give you a couple of tips.

1.)  Buy a Cheshire Cat: Crazy people need pets.  No, really, we do.  Listen to me.  Mad people must employ all means of therapy at their disposal.  Pets walk around our homes acting cute and distracting us from the fact we're sitting in Wonderland.  If you're the wrong sort of person than you could purchase a dog, but if you want my opinion (or my friendship) feline friends are the way to go.  They're delightful.  Need proof?  Sure you do.  Last year, someone special to me introduced to Simon's Kitten's and I've been hooked ever since.  Enjoy!

2.) Chase the White Rabbit: Citizens of Wonderland the hard truth is you won't be sane over night and, let's be honest here, our version of sanity is still a rather loopy.  You can wait for the day when you are the least trippy to follow your heart, but, I wouldn't suggest it.  Hearts are funny things, my Friends, and listening to them tends to change our outlook.  Gives you something or someone to hold onto when you're down and to pray for when you're alone.  A light in the darkness.  Good news here is that being just a little crazy makes it easier speak up.   Personally, I am fit for a straight jacket but I can only hope that makes me somewhat attractive or endearing on a weird level.

3.) Look to the Hookah Smoking Caterpillar: Allow me to add one caveat to Chase the White Rabbit.  Crazy people sometimes say too much.  We don't mean to, but its in our nature.  All our desires and thoughts come spilling out because we lack the proper filtration system that would make us more cautious...and sane.  This means we need wise friends to slow us down and talk us off the ledge when we go goofy.  Personally, I turn to my friend Maggie and my brother on a regular basis for advice.  But as a rule of thumb, running a plan by the Caterpillar before launching into action is always a wise move.

Finally, do not ask yourself why you are in Wonderland.  Why is raven like a writing desk?  We don't know.  All we know is that we are mad.  If we weren't, we wouldn't be here.

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