Friday, November 16, 2012

What I Want

"Can you understand me a little, love me a little?  For all my despair, for all my ideals, for all that-I love life.  But it is hard, and I have so much-so very much to learn."  (Sylvia Plath, Unabridged Journals)  

"And when at last you find someone to whom you feel you can pour out your soul, you stop in shock at the words you utter-- they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless and feeble from being kept in the small cramped dark inside you so long." (Ibid.)

I want to sleep, but I can't.  I want to write, but the words won't come.  I want to paint, but I haven't the time.  I want to run away, but I can't find the proper excuse.  I want to finish a novel, but I can't concentrate.  I want to read the end of my story, but I can't find the right book.  I want to know everything will be alright, but life doesn't provide that reassurance.  I want to be saner.  I want to be kinder.  I want to know my heart is safe.  I want so many things, but they all seem just out of reach.

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