Thursday, August 22, 2013

Purging: Clean Slate

Yours Truly has never been a patient soul.  Nope.  When I want something, I go after it with a type of enthusiasm reserved for zealots and Gideons (same thing perhaps), and then I wait with bated breath for whatever I desire to magically unfold, like a job in Lexington for instance.  Thus far, the hiring gods have referred me to various departments for eight different positions at the University of Kentucky.  And if you're me, and you're not so be grateful, in the interim, you purge your apartment and pack up your belongings in anticipation.  Purging you say?  Of what pray tell?  Well, unwanted clutter for one...but, also, anything that reminds me of him: a thank you note, pottery I made, music I listened to, something I had saved for his birthday, etc.  Its all going in the trash.  In fact, it even feels good to pack away the books he recommended.  Now, they aren't sitting there mocking me in some strange way I don't understand.  Because the thing is, sometimes I still feel like less because of the way he treated me, but the truth is, I'm not.  I'm still who I was pre-the Mess.  A clean slate.  That's what I need, Guys.  Everyday, I work to find a job, pack a few of my things, trash a few more, then pray to God something opens up.

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