Saturday, October 12, 2013


Guess what Guys? = ) Finally, after two years, I know I am gonna be okay.  Things that have been foggy for so long are so freakin' clear.  Yep, I let some idiot push me way past my breaking point, and, each and every time, rather than calling him on his shit, I cried.  Everyone, and I mean everyone, told me to cut my losses.  My friends used all the cliches: "He ain't worth it."  "You can do way better." "We don't think you're thinking clearly here."  "This isn't you."  "You didn't want him two years ago.  Why now?" "We can't see what you see in him."  "He's an awful person.  Why?"  And I'd just cry and wonder what I had done wrong?  Nothing that's what!  I did nothing wrong.  And I forget that sometimes.  Because here's the deal.  If he was even my friend, he'd had treated me better (the Christmas cookies I made him still make me cringe).  He wouldn't have played with me during a depressive episode.  Not when I was so sick I nearly killed myself.  He would have had a fucking soul.  He doesn't.  Good luck with that!  This is the one and only time you guys will see me define my experience by a Katy Perry Song.  But here it is.  When some bastard fucks you over.  Don't cry.  Roar.

I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything

You held me down, but I got up 
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, you hear that sound
Like thunder gonna shake the ground
You held me down, but I got up
Get ready cause I’ve had enough
I see it all, I see it now

I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than a lion
Cause I am a champion and you’re gonna hear me roar

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