Sunday, December 22, 2013
Oh What a Day! Oh What a Rant!
We are hanging by a thread here. Today was hell. A Knockdown Drag-Out with my Parents plus added Holiday Stress is taking its toll. How do I know? Well, A.) I want to sit and bawl and B.) I flip from wanting to yell at He Who Must Not Be Named to wanting to talk to Him. Of course, neither option is particularly helpful. Let's be honest, why am I reacting this way? Because its my fall back response, she says in a knowing tone. In times of stress I idealize his Sad Sack Life. But let's lay all the cards on the table now: He's a dating (if that is what you can call it because my friends call it something else entirely) a Pseudo-Intellectual who resembles (if you will allow me to draw a picture) one of the Dancing Hippos from Fantasia but who is generally much less attractive and, on the whole, much more vulgar and crass. So what have I been pining for?: He's a washed up Forty Three Year old living in Central Indiana, working at a Pathetic Little College, and Who has Generally Failed at Life. (No seriously, He went to an Ivy League University, and somehow landed here) Combine this with his general lack of communication skills, seeming inability to form normal relationships, and what have you got?: The man I idolized. Oh, how I would cry. My brother reminds me that attachment was born out of extreme illness...and without the illness, perhaps, there would have never been an attachment.